laughter is the best medicine: Archive

laughter is the best medicine

January 2011

71 posts

CBS Evening News

You did not make me feel bad for the rich people who don’t pay their multi-million dollar mortgages. In fact, you just pissed me off more…. This guy hasn’t paid his mortgage in two years! My friend was receiving threatening calls from her mortgage broker after two months of late payments (not non-payments). Socioeconomic favoritism there, like always.

Language Developer

Wayne was playing Just Cause 2 last night when Jazzie and I returned from our avoid-the-woo-cuddle-party outing. We started watching the game play and I thought that it would be awesome to become a travel consultant for gaming companies. The idea snowballed into language development when the dialect for [the fictional island of] Panau was spoken. I thought it has elements of Tagalog but I...

You may be a nerd if...

… when you meet someone new and they mention that their nephew will be cooking that night you say “well, I hope he has more skills than a Sim”. :-\ LOL

a place to love dogs: Top 10 Smartest Dogs →

aplacetolovedogs: Dogs are known as man’s best friend, though we can’t always say that’s true. If you have ever owned a dog, you probably encountered those days where you have a slight bit of regret for getting the dog. From chewed up shoes to messy carpet to washing a smelly dog that only seems to smell worse… ^^ Hells yeah, Papillon!! :-D

really gotta catch up

nodcast, jakearoodog, nileearls, thebayareanative, -islandgirl-, dominodollhouse, ifuseekjosh, unironedtrousers, irisblasi, couturecourier, activebodi, ufocottoncandy, eastbayraw, thetenssf*, tsibugan, mustamuseme, neyugnneit, dan632, and beautylish. *I was reading my dash on a full bladder at work and when I saw this I almost peed my pants, so I ran to the bathroom…

Anonymous asked: That's good cause my mind is filthy

You misread that part

Under “education” in my resume, that’s psychology not psychic. I can’t read your mind.

Zombie Hipsters

“I can’t eat that person - I’m vegan.” The concept works as both zombies and hipsters are dead on the inside. Hipsters were void of emotion before the apocalypse.

baseln asked: I would not smoke in front of hospitals for the patients' health, but I find the sanctimonious views of medical students about smoking insufferable. I smoke, therefore I must be a terrible, lazy, person who doesn't understand science.

whatsurdamage: Okay, so Iron Man 2 and shitty fake 3D Alice in Wonderland get nominated for Best Visual Effects but no TRON: Legacy? Also, no love for the Daft Punk score? It’s the 80s all over again and I actually mean that in a bad way! :-( Let’s have our own awards on Tumblr.

According to the other barista - not BBS - I look like one of these two names. I don’t see it.

During our coffee run one morning, I leaned against the sneeze guard and motioned at the barista machine slyly remarking “this bad boy was made in Switzerland”. My friend looked at me in horror, “how could you possibly know that!?” I was really confused by her reaction. “It says so on the machine”, I replied. “Oh! You meant the machine - I thought you meant the barista [server].” She thought I...

When you walk in E-Bay,

You may end up walking 3.5 miles without knowing it. But damn, will you feel it the following day.

TLC: why don't you go back to being "The Learning...

“Life Unscripted” and those other directions killed you. The thought that you were owned by Fox came across my mind tonight and I was taken aback to find out Discovery is your parent company. I don’t learn a damn thing watching your channel and I don’t like your “Life Surprises” either!

shensations-deactivated20111006 asked: He definitely is!

Ah well, I just had to get all that out. Hope you're doing well today :)

I’m sorry I constantly take your [collective] name in vain by exclaiming ‘stupid cow’. You are probably not stupid creatures and you have given me plenty of sustenance so I should be more grateful. I will try to utilize words such as ‘git’, ‘douchebag’, and ‘idiot’ more often. I will actively deter the amount of times I insult you cows by...

I think I should have a tea party...

… to take back the term “tea party”. Seriously, my cuppa and biscuits disagree with your politics and don’t think you should ruin something so awesome. Just thought I’d bring up the rant again.

When I open my clinic's mail,

I sing “Mail Time” a la Blue’s Clues.

Anonymous asked: I am desperate for some advice. I have no friends. None. I used to. Not anymore. Its not like I have really done anything to make my old friends mad/hate me/whatever, its just that these friendships have dissolved. Everyone has moved on. I basically sit in school silent now, because I lack the social skills that are necessary for daily life. I had two best friends, the best of friends, and I...

For giving me an addiction and taking it away all in the same week. I’m preserving that season finale for tomorrow. :-P

My 28-year old sister used the word “retarded” in lieu of “stupid” on her Facebook to describe the word uber, so I called her out on it and when she tried to claim [the use of “retarded”] is acceptable worldwide I smacked her down. So what does she do? She doesn’t apologize, no, no…. She deletes our argument. Good job on the lack of humility there,...

TVLand has original series?

I thought it was Nick-at-Nite all the time… ? Why isn’t it Bewitched, I Dream of Jeannie, The Munsters, MASH, Happy Days, Lavern and Shirley, I Love Lucy, The Jeffersons, etc?

Anonymous asked: I love a woman with great stems. Pix?

My "coconut cracking" legs

As my friend lovingly calls them, cost me a pair of jeggings. My calves were too muscular. Damn? Lol.

I just want to put the check mark on that box for why there was a delay in the pt pursuing care.

"Sometimes We're Open" Fitness wasn't catchy

If you ever listen to a 24 Hour Fitness radio commercial you will learn that the actors and scripts are borderline kitschy, but more importantly you will hear that not all locations are 24 hours. Business plan execution fail on that one, Executive Dumb Dumb.

Reminiscing about them while at Target then my habit of reading the fine print kicked in. Sausage: made with chicken, pork, and beef. There goes that craving.

I thought it was “fuck the world” as it sprung up around the same time as FML, so I was getting real pissed off that people were using it all the time - that’s rather abrasive. Why should the world fuck off because your pasta wasn’t al dente? Imagine my surprise when I found out the real meaning… Interesting. I don’t think many other people who used it were...

American English Dialects →

ieatpaintchips: Canada’s on there, too. Though not as detailed as the U.S.

Learning Languages →

If you are a foreign language enthusiast, a polyglot or just want to learn a new language on your own, you will find here: How to choose a new language to learn A detailed, hands-on guide to teaching yourself a foreign language. Reviews of books about language learning The questions about language learning people ask me most frequently.

shensations-deactivated20111006 asked: First off, I am SO happy you have an Ask now :D You're my favorite <3 <3 <3

Secondly, Kyle and his friends took me to the gym with them last night to teach me how to trick. Tricking is like martial arts+gymnastics+dance+parkour. So I'm sore from my neck down and signed myself out of school hehe. :)

dragonflyb-deactivated20110622 asked: I keep seeing the name Haruki Murakami pop up, which is usually a sign the universe is trying to tell me something. Though, I finally picked up Juliet, Naked and was bored to tears. Nick Hornby's stories may make a good movie, but to get through the written part was trite. (Opinion., but it says something for me to offer a negative one, because I'm generally easy to please.)

Reblog this post if you've never sent someone a...

savage-mike: iandsharman: mariomariolemieux: Don’t hate, congratulate. I’ve sent plenty of Anon messages, but none of them hate. I prefer to use being anon to brighten people’s days, not to spread misery and hate. The only anonymous messages I ever leave on Tumblr are exceedingly perverted. Never any hatred. I’m one of those people who says what they want to say and says it to your face;...

Best way to start the morning is by listening to at least one album by The Go! Team. Dance party on the train!!

producer =/= creative director

My battery on my iPhone was dying so I turned it off and pretended to be listening to music when I was really eavesdropping. I overheard this uber hipster girl bitching about a Wild Western Saloon-styled bar called “Prohibition”. Apparently it was a location for a movie she was producing and the crew were upset about something and she told the cinematographer, DP, etc. (all of whom she...

over-the-counter orthotics

I decided to invest in some arch supports and toe sleeves as I’m pretty much convinced that I’m going to develop AAFD or hammertoes. The toe sleeves aren’t as uncomfortable as I imagined, but since the arch supports aren’t custom-fitted they’re quite difficult to deal with - maybe because sizes 5-10 are umbrellaed together. Really? My huge feet cannot fit into a size...

now that we've simmered down...

Okay followers, you’ll have to forgive me as my work browser is IE and I can’t ask @proseandcons personally but I’ll throw it out there for everyone: Favorite guilty pleasure show. You know, the show everyone hates or ridicules but you love. Mine include “teen drama” shows like Degrassi, Edgemont, Skins, 90210 (original) old school TGIF (Boy Meets World, Family...